Michael Cera's Next Movie

Let me start off with a disclaimer: I Love Michael Cera. I have loved him every since he started out at the awkward George Michael on "Arrested Development," and I have enjoyed every movie he has been in since then. I write this, Michael Cera, not cause I do not like you, but because I am worried about you. After watching Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist yesterday, a movie I really enjoyed, and I realized Michael Cera needs to take action. He needs to go outside the box and do something he has not done before: a drama, an action movie, a horror movie. Anything. Here are some suggestions for future movies:

The Cure
When the youngest scientist (Cera) in a group accidentally creates a neurological deadly disease, he is worried of the consequences. While looking to find a way to destroy this specimen, a group of terrorists break into the complex and steal the formula for the disease. Now, the scientists must work to find a cure before this virus is released, and Cera decides to go after the terrorists, feeling responsible for the fate of the world. When the terrorists end up being a group genetically altered super bears, Cera faces the ultimate challenge of man vs. wild.

Frostbite
Five high school kids (Michael Cera, Ellen Page, Jonah Hill, Kat Dennings, and Clark Duke) head out for a ski weekend at Cera's remote cabin. What starts out as a enjoyable weekend suddenly turns to strange. Their skis go missing. The car won't start. They begin seeing and hearing things around the cabin. What started out as a race down the mountain ends in a fight for their lives against a group of cannabalistic stay-at-home moms.

The Warning Track
Dennis (Michael Cera) had always loved baseball. He was a star on the varsity baseball team in high school, but when a brawl broke out against their rival team, Dennis was suspended for the rest of the regular season for killing a player. Now, Dennis starts working with the coaching staff to make the playoffs so he can get his chance to play again. Everything leads up to the championship game against their rival team. Is the glory of victory worth losing his life to the gang of ornery oponents? Based on a true story.

Condemned
After failing his AP US History Test, Jack Alexander (Michael Cera) wakes up the next morning to find himself in 1776. Now, he must relive US history as a social figure from that period in order to get it right this time. Jack starts out as George Washington, and becomes other famous historical figures like John Wilkes Booth, Andrew Carnegie, Hitler, Martin Luther King Jr., and George W. Bush. What starts out as Jack trying to relive history ends in him changing it entirely when he acidentially blows up the world. Oh well.

Porn
Not just regular old porn, but kinky, toys and all porn. I'm talking laser light shows, fog machines, bounce houses, roller derbies, and Burger King ball pits. But when Michael Cera is clothed he should wear a striped polo with a zip up hoodie, as well as courdoroy pants. He should also have a shy, awkward personality. Instead of traditional porn music there should be indie music chosen by Michael Cera himself.